Grace’s First Communion

Click this link to see pictures from the latest blog.

Click this link to see pictures from other posts.

When we were home for our first summer after moving to Spain, Grace was hesitant about returning to Zaragoza as the transition to a new country, language and school had been difficult.  Interestingly, the one thing that had caught her attention was that in Grade 3 she could start Catechism classes and after two years she would be able to have her 1^st Communion.  She was very interested and excited and about this which helped when we returned to start our second year.

Grace goes to a Jesuit school and the Catechism program is organized by a teacher, supported by the priests and taught by volunteer parents.  So from Oct – May every Wednesday from 5-6pm for Grade 3 and until this past February Grace attended her Catechism class.  The groups are small, with 5-6 children each, and 2-3 times a semester parents are invited for a chapel service to see what they are learning and to support the process.  Participating in catechism is voluntary although it is interesting to note that all of the 26 kids from Grace’s class joined.  When asking about this we learned that the First Communion in Spain is an incredibly important event and families treat the celebration like a small wedding.  All the components from the dress, photographs, luncheon reception, gifts and guests are a part of this day.  It is also true that for many the religious significance has been lost and many families do it because it is a ‘cultural’ tradition and many children want it because they score great gifts.  Our school went to great lengths to emphasize the spiritual and sacramental significance and even sent notes home asking us to talk to our children about not focusing on the gifts.  To give you an idea of an average communion gift for a 9-10 year old, they often receive PlayStations, IPads, jewelry etc.

So last October we began planning for Grace’s First Communion which was on March 16^th 2013.   The first thing to secure was the restaurant for lunch and we were told that as soon as you say it is a “First Communion”, the price goes up (doubles).  In fact we discovered that, not surprisingly, this event is big business and can end up costing a small fortune.  We were not willing to pay ‘double’ the price as it just did not seem reasonable so we took a different approach.  When we went to meet with the food and beverage manager of a very nice hotel we explained that we were a Canadian family who had relatives coming to visit (true: my parents were arriving) and we wanted to host a lunch for them with our friends.  So out came the menus with reasonable prices and an excellent selection of dishes.  We booked a private dining room for no charge and explained that we would be bringing in homemade cupcakes to serve our guests.  Perfect – more on this later. 

A small book could be written on how we chose the dress, hairband, shoes and commemorative book marks that we had to have printed; not to mention the clothes for the mother and sister of the ‘celebrated’ one.  Again we were trying to find a balance between participating in this important Spanish celebration while not getting pulled into all the ‘you have to…’ when it didn’t feel comfortable to us.  In the end we feel very good about the Canadian/Spanish balance we found and the experience was wonderful and very special.

The Big Day

Grace was very excited and very nervous about the service.  During the practices the children were asked if they would like to read during the service and, although nervous, Grace volunteered as she really wanted to participate and fully be a part of the service.  The service was held in the church sanctuary at our school, we have our own parish and priests. Again to give an idea of how important this event is, the service was for the 26 children in Grace’s class and there were over 1000 people in attendance!  The church was full to overflowing and if you do the math that is approximately 40 people for each child – wow!  Also in keeping with the Jesuit tradition all the children wear an off white hooded robe so that the focus remains on the sacrament and not on fashion.  With so many people in the church, a professional photographer is the only one allowed to take photos and he captures the moment the child receives the bread and also takes photos before the service (see photos).  Grace spoke very well and we were told she sounded very Spanish, yeah!! And during the priest’s homily she offered a number of answers on her own.  It was a very emotional and meaningful experience for Grace and it was lovely one to witness.

After the service at 1pm we headed directly to the Hotel Hiberus which is a new modern hotel on the Ebro River.  The weather was unusually cold so we couldn’t use the lovely sundeck; however the restaurant is all windows so it was bright and nice.  As we walked in we went through a larger room that was beautifully decorated with stands of champagne and flowers etc into our room which was plain, but lovely.  As we were standing and chatting, the party arrived to the other room and Grace said, “Mommy look: it is Juan from my class, he is having his communion lunch right next to ours”.  The funny thing is we could clearly see the difference between family lunch and 1^st communion; however the fabulous food all came from the same kitchen and we knew how different the prices were.  At our lunch we hosted 23 people including ourselves and 10 of those were children so the kids had a great time playing together.  As I said the food was fabulous, we had a traditional Spanish menu which includes 1^st plate, 2^nd plate, dessert, wine, water and bread. 

In terms of gifts we asked our friends to not buy electronics but to give Grace something to remember her communion in Spain.  She was showered with the most beautiful pendants, earrings, bracelets and one fabulous electronic (Google Galaxy 7).  The jewellery was mostly representing the Virgin of El Pilar which is our Basilica and is the center of one of the largest celebrations in all of Spain.  She now, at 9 years old, has a collection of jewellery to be envied.  It was wonderful to have Cathy’s parents here and also to realize what a lovely group of friends and surrogate family we have developed here in Spain.

The Spanish are known for long celebrations so after the lunch we invited everyone back to our house for gin & tonics – a must, following a meal here – as well as wine and finger foods.  The day ended around 10pm when the last of the guests left and we fell into bed satisfied that we had participated in a very Spanish tradition that enriched our experience and understanding a little more.

Cathy’s parent’s arranged to come 2 weeks early to be a part of this event and with friends from Valencia also invited 23 people joined in our celebration.  A highlight of our stay in Spain, for sure!